1 00:00:00,931 --> 00:00:03,041 - Warning, the following program contains 2 00:00:03,072 --> 00:00:05,212 really course language, weed, alcohol consumption, 3 00:00:05,246 --> 00:00:08,036 smoking, and sexual inferences. 4 00:00:08,077 --> 00:00:09,697 This content may not be suitable 5 00:00:09,733 --> 00:00:11,363 for viewers under 18. 6 00:00:11,390 --> 00:00:13,080 To activate parental controls, 7 00:00:13,116 --> 00:00:15,046 please press the go [bleep] yourself button 8 00:00:15,084 --> 00:00:16,434 on your remote control. 9 00:00:17,362 --> 00:00:22,542 [bright piano music] [children playing] 10 00:00:27,924 --> 00:00:28,824 - [Ricky] What's up man? 11 00:00:28,856 --> 00:00:29,676 - Ricky, what's going on? 12 00:00:29,719 --> 00:00:30,859 - Sup boys? 13 00:00:30,892 --> 00:00:32,272 - [Bubbles] What are you doin? I got you some socks. 14 00:00:32,308 --> 00:00:33,618 - [Julian] Got some socks. - Right on. 15 00:00:33,654 --> 00:00:35,624 - Nice socks. 16 00:00:35,656 --> 00:00:37,036 The buy-way, on sale. 17 00:00:37,071 --> 00:00:38,251 - White and black. 18 00:00:38,279 --> 00:00:39,489 - Yeah. - Got two colors 19 00:00:39,522 --> 00:00:40,452 white and black. 20 00:00:41,351 --> 00:00:43,041 What are you doing? What are those? 21 00:00:43,077 --> 00:00:45,007 - Just waitin for the fuckin 22 00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:46,385 bolognairs to get ready boys. 23 00:00:46,425 --> 00:00:48,455 - [Bubbles] Holy fuck, you're making bolognairs? 24 00:00:48,496 --> 00:00:49,006 - Fuckin' rights. 25 00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:50,359 - Decent! 26 00:00:50,395 --> 00:00:52,805 - Thought we'd have somethin' special for this little 27 00:00:52,845 --> 00:00:53,535 thing today. 28 00:00:53,570 --> 00:00:54,570 - Decent, all right! 29 00:00:54,606 --> 00:00:55,496 Get er goin! - What the fuck is that? 30 00:00:55,538 --> 00:00:57,128 - What the hell, is that a turntable? 31 00:00:57,160 --> 00:00:58,640 - [Bubbles] Yeah. 32 00:00:58,679 --> 00:00:59,609 - Did you make that? - [Ricky] He just gonna sleep 33 00:00:59,645 --> 00:01:00,535 through this, is he? 34 00:01:00,577 --> 00:01:02,097 - [Bubbles] What? - [Julian] Who is? 35 00:01:02,131 --> 00:01:03,751 - [Ricky] Met some fuckin guy at the legion last night 36 00:01:03,787 --> 00:01:04,817 and decided to come back - Ricky who the fuck is that? 37 00:01:04,857 --> 00:01:05,817 - and party. 38 00:01:05,858 --> 00:01:07,718 I think his name's Jerry? 39 00:01:07,757 --> 00:01:08,757 - You picked up a dude at the legion last night? 40 00:01:08,792 --> 00:01:09,792 - I didn't pick him up, no 41 00:01:09,828 --> 00:01:10,548 we were partying - You picked him up. 42 00:01:10,587 --> 00:01:11,447 and he wanted to keep 43 00:01:11,485 --> 00:01:11,995 fuckin partying - Hey bud! 44 00:01:12,279 --> 00:01:13,689 so we came back here. 45 00:01:13,728 --> 00:01:16,008 - Bud, you gotta go, we gotta shoot a thing, you gotta get- 46 00:01:16,041 --> 00:01:17,561 [man speaks in foreign language] 47 00:01:17,594 --> 00:01:19,494 - I'm just, uh, traveling through. 48 00:01:19,527 --> 00:01:19,977 - [Bubbles] Ricky! 49 00:01:20,010 --> 00:01:21,010 - [Ricky] What? 50 00:01:21,046 --> 00:01:22,116 - That's Terry! - He said I could- 51 00:01:22,151 --> 00:01:23,221 he said I could take five. - That's who? 52 00:01:23,255 --> 00:01:24,185 - [Ricky] Terry, yeah, that's it. 53 00:01:24,222 --> 00:01:25,122 - [Bubbles] That's Terry! 54 00:01:25,154 --> 00:01:25,844 - [Julian] Who's Terry? 55 00:01:25,878 --> 00:01:26,878 - [Bubbles] Terry! 56 00:01:26,914 --> 00:01:29,094 From the FUBAR movie! [indistinct] 57 00:01:29,123 --> 00:01:30,163 - [Julian] What the fuck is he doing here? 58 00:01:30,193 --> 00:01:31,333 - What's that? 59 00:01:31,367 --> 00:01:32,157 - [Bubbles] Ricky where didja meet him at? 60 00:01:32,195 --> 00:01:33,125 - Fuck. - I'm fuckin- 61 00:01:33,162 --> 00:01:34,232 - You know what? - You fuckin get 62 00:01:34,266 --> 00:01:35,296 dinner goin, or what? 63 00:01:35,336 --> 00:01:36,986 - [Ricky] Yeah man. 64 00:01:37,027 --> 00:01:38,127 I fuckin know who you are now. 65 00:01:38,167 --> 00:01:39,997 - Ricky 'member we went to the movies? 66 00:01:40,030 --> 00:01:40,790 - I didn't know he was famous. 67 00:01:40,824 --> 00:01:41,554 - Fuck. - Well fuck. 68 00:01:41,584 --> 00:01:42,274 - He's a good partier 69 00:01:42,309 --> 00:01:43,209 let me tell ya - Hey Terry! 70 00:01:43,241 --> 00:01:43,791 What's goin on? - How's it goin! 71 00:01:43,827 --> 00:01:44,927 I'm Terry! 72 00:01:44,966 --> 00:01:45,926 What's your name? - Bubbles, how ya doin? 73 00:01:45,967 --> 00:01:47,177 - Bubbles, nice ta fuckin meet you! 74 00:01:47,210 --> 00:01:49,210 - Good to meet you! - I seen you! 75 00:01:49,247 --> 00:01:51,207 - Ya have on the TV. - Fuck I'm a little dizzy guys 76 00:01:51,249 --> 00:01:52,529 - [Ricky] You fuckin gave her last night 77 00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:54,420 - I'm a little dizzy. What's your name, bud? 78 00:01:54,459 --> 00:01:55,599 - [Julian] Hey what's up. Julien man. 79 00:01:55,632 --> 00:01:58,262 - Nice to fuckin pleasure, right on. 80 00:01:58,290 --> 00:01:59,050 - You were right out of her 81 00:01:59,084 --> 00:02:00,124 were ya? - Fuck yeah, 82 00:02:00,154 --> 00:02:01,914 no I was just a bit parched. - Oh man. 83 00:02:01,949 --> 00:02:03,189 - We gave her fuckin hard last night. 84 00:02:03,226 --> 00:02:04,226 - You want a beer? - Yeah fuck. 85 00:02:04,262 --> 00:02:06,752 Sorry guys, just crashin' out there. 86 00:02:06,781 --> 00:02:07,201 - Yeah no worries. 87 00:02:07,230 --> 00:02:08,710 - We're just, 88 00:02:08,749 --> 00:02:09,199 shooting something here man. - Here pull up a speaker. 89 00:02:09,232 --> 00:02:10,442 - Well gee uh- 90 00:02:10,475 --> 00:02:12,195 - You can be in the thing with us here if you want 91 00:02:12,235 --> 00:02:13,305 just pull up a speaker. 92 00:02:13,340 --> 00:02:15,200 - [Ricky] Easy on the speakers, Bubs. 93 00:02:15,238 --> 00:02:17,448 - Fuck, sorry guys, I went a little rough there. 94 00:02:17,482 --> 00:02:18,552 - Fuck. 95 00:02:18,586 --> 00:02:19,616 - Holy shit. - I can't believe your 96 00:02:19,656 --> 00:02:20,546 partying with Terry! 97 00:02:21,313 --> 00:02:22,693 [Bubbles laughs] - Hey um, 98 00:02:22,728 --> 00:02:23,348 - Terry! 99 00:02:23,384 --> 00:02:24,394 - I wish I remembered it. 100 00:02:24,420 --> 00:02:25,660 - Is there a- - Where's Deaner at? 101 00:02:25,697 --> 00:02:27,107 He's not here, is he? - Sorry I just- 102 00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:28,767 - I just have a little, one second there guys, 103 00:02:28,803 --> 00:02:30,183 sorry I just got a- 104 00:02:30,219 --> 00:02:31,739 [burps] Where's the shitter? 105 00:02:31,772 --> 00:02:33,012 - [Julian] What is this, 106 00:02:33,049 --> 00:02:33,909 you're gonna take a- - [Bubbles] It's down there, 107 00:02:33,946 --> 00:02:34,946 don't piss in the - Oh fuck, 108 00:02:34,982 --> 00:02:35,742 sorry. 109 00:02:35,776 --> 00:02:36,706 - Piss down there, yeah? 110 00:02:36,742 --> 00:02:38,882 - Hold on guys, I'll be right fuckin back. 111 00:02:38,917 --> 00:02:39,947 - Ricky. 112 00:02:39,987 --> 00:02:41,327 You met Terry! 113 00:02:41,368 --> 00:02:44,268 - I had no idea, I can fuckin tell ya he can party. 114 00:02:44,302 --> 00:02:45,542 Holy fuck. - Well fuck. 115 00:02:45,579 --> 00:02:47,579 - The fuckin beers he was shotgunning was nuts! 116 00:02:47,615 --> 00:02:50,545 - Yeah, fuck, he's one of the craziest drinkers 117 00:02:50,584 --> 00:02:51,964 I've ever seen. 118 00:02:51,999 --> 00:02:54,309 - I don't remember much after leaving the fuckin legion. 119 00:02:54,346 --> 00:02:55,866 - [Julian] What, crazier than Lahey? 120 00:02:55,899 --> 00:02:58,069 - Hey sorry guys I, fuck I don't even really remember 121 00:02:58,108 --> 00:02:59,658 I didn't meet you there again? 122 00:02:59,696 --> 00:03:00,836 - You just met me man - Fuck, sorry. 123 00:03:00,870 --> 00:03:01,560 It's Julian. - Julian. 124 00:03:01,595 --> 00:03:02,415 For fuck sakes. 125 00:03:02,458 --> 00:03:03,768 - Bubbles. - Bubbles, yeah. 126 00:03:03,804 --> 00:03:04,914 - Didja wash your hands, man? - I remember you from 127 00:03:04,943 --> 00:03:05,633 last night. - Yeah man. 128 00:03:05,668 --> 00:03:06,458 - Terry. 129 00:03:06,496 --> 00:03:07,596 - Fuck that was a ripper! [howls] 130 00:03:07,635 --> 00:03:08,905 - Fuck yeah man. 131 00:03:08,947 --> 00:03:11,087 - I'm gonna just have a cool one if that's all right. 132 00:03:11,121 --> 00:03:11,981 - Right in the door there. 133 00:03:12,019 --> 00:03:13,049 - This one? Thanks guys! 134 00:03:13,089 --> 00:03:13,989 Fucks - Pass me one too 135 00:03:14,021 --> 00:03:15,201 I'll take one - Oh there ya go 136 00:03:15,229 --> 00:03:16,959 bud, is that the right one? Anyone else want 137 00:03:16,989 --> 00:03:17,959 a brewski there? 138 00:03:17,990 --> 00:03:18,990 - I'll take one of the other ones 139 00:03:19,026 --> 00:03:20,096 the green bastards, bud. 140 00:03:20,130 --> 00:03:22,060 - Green bastards, there ya go. 141 00:03:22,098 --> 00:03:22,928 - There, we'll take that. 142 00:03:22,961 --> 00:03:24,381 - Right on, fuck 143 00:03:24,411 --> 00:03:25,761 that was a real where were we - That reminds me of the 144 00:03:25,791 --> 00:03:26,761 there. - Trevor bit. 145 00:03:26,792 --> 00:03:27,792 Just like Trevor. [beers opening] 146 00:03:27,828 --> 00:03:29,308 - Fuck, and you got the berlones, 147 00:03:29,347 --> 00:03:30,277 what's it called again? 148 00:03:30,313 --> 00:03:31,493 - Bolognairs - Bolognairs 149 00:03:31,521 --> 00:03:34,081 - Bolognairs, last night we were fuckin' sittin'- 150 00:03:34,110 --> 00:03:35,150 Cheers boys! 151 00:03:35,180 --> 00:03:37,250 Fuck right on, right on. - Cheers man. 152 00:03:37,286 --> 00:03:39,596 - We was sittin on the fuckin' curb, starvin' 153 00:03:39,633 --> 00:03:40,573 everything's closed up, and he says 154 00:03:40,599 --> 00:03:42,289 "I got an idea for somethin'." 155 00:03:42,325 --> 00:03:44,215 - And then we fuckin' passed out. 156 00:03:44,258 --> 00:03:45,288 - Yeah? 157 00:03:45,328 --> 00:03:47,368 - But now we're fuckin' gonna get it. 158 00:03:47,399 --> 00:03:48,919 - Bolognairs. Ricky she's startin' to 159 00:03:48,952 --> 00:03:50,542 - Startin' to get a little- Startin' to blister there 160 00:03:50,575 --> 00:03:52,295 you might wanna cut that layer off. 161 00:03:52,335 --> 00:03:53,405 - All right, hold on a second. 162 00:03:53,440 --> 00:03:55,440 - Do you, have you ever had a donair? 163 00:03:55,476 --> 00:03:56,786 You know what a donair is? 164 00:03:56,822 --> 00:03:59,242 - Oh fuck yeah, my cousin, she worked at the mall 165 00:03:59,273 --> 00:04:00,593 and I had them all the time, so. 166 00:04:00,619 --> 00:04:03,279 But this is like a real inovation, I ain't never seen 167 00:04:03,312 --> 00:04:04,522 anything like that. 168 00:04:04,554 --> 00:04:06,324 - Fuckin' bologna donairs I think are better than 169 00:04:06,349 --> 00:04:07,419 real don- - Oh no. 170 00:04:07,454 --> 00:04:10,664 - [Bubbles] No, it's not attached to it. 171 00:04:10,698 --> 00:04:13,008 - Holy fuck, these are gonna be somethin'. 172 00:04:14,219 --> 00:04:17,019 [warbling noise] 173 00:04:18,327 --> 00:04:21,397 [heavy breathing] 174 00:04:22,296 --> 00:04:25,266 [Bubbles laughs] 175 00:04:29,234 --> 00:04:31,484 - Oh my god, I'm freakin' out! 176 00:04:31,512 --> 00:04:33,722 I'm freakin' out right now! 177 00:04:33,756 --> 00:04:35,136 It's Bubbles here, 178 00:04:35,171 --> 00:04:37,551 in my command module I built. 179 00:04:37,587 --> 00:04:41,557 I'm sittin' with this fella here, he's 180 00:04:43,144 --> 00:04:46,324 Mission Specialist One on STS74. 181 00:04:46,355 --> 00:04:48,495 Mission Specialist One on STS100. 182 00:04:48,529 --> 00:04:51,639 And then he flew the Soyuz up, docked her with the 183 00:04:51,670 --> 00:04:54,810 International Space Station, was up there for 5 months. 184 00:04:54,846 --> 00:04:57,636 That's the one and only Chris Hadfield, 185 00:04:57,676 --> 00:05:01,296 Colonel Hadfield, right here! In my spaceship! 186 00:05:01,335 --> 00:05:02,195 [Bubbles laughs] 187 00:05:02,232 --> 00:05:03,102 Welcome! 188 00:05:03,130 --> 00:05:03,960 - Thank you. Colonel. 189 00:05:03,993 --> 00:05:04,723 Commander. 190 00:05:04,752 --> 00:05:05,272 - Thank you, Bubbles. 191 00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:06,475 - How are ya doin'? 192 00:05:06,513 --> 00:05:07,173 - Thank you. I'm sitting in the commanders seat. 193 00:05:07,203 --> 00:05:08,583 [Bubbles laughs] 194 00:05:08,618 --> 00:05:11,658 - I'm freakin' out, I'll tell ya' right now, I can barely 195 00:05:11,690 --> 00:05:15,040 barely keep it together here. 'Cause this is, ya' know, 196 00:05:15,073 --> 00:05:17,423 I built this, this is what I, 197 00:05:17,455 --> 00:05:19,695 like to play space in here, and I know it's, 198 00:05:19,733 --> 00:05:23,363 it's pretty accurate to, to what you're used to I believe. 199 00:05:23,392 --> 00:05:25,572 - [laughs] It is. It is. 200 00:05:25,601 --> 00:05:27,361 There are several realistic things here. 201 00:05:27,396 --> 00:05:28,326 - [Bubbles] Yeah I like this thing, 202 00:05:28,362 --> 00:05:30,472 I'm sure ya' have one of those. 203 00:05:30,502 --> 00:05:32,612 Everybody needs one of those. 204 00:05:32,642 --> 00:05:35,232 Anyway, so I wanted to just ask you 205 00:05:35,265 --> 00:05:38,335 some things about space, if that's cool. 206 00:05:38,372 --> 00:05:39,512 - I'm ready. 207 00:05:39,546 --> 00:05:42,406 - Oh I mean, I been trying to be a space man, 208 00:05:42,445 --> 00:05:44,205 pretty much my whole life I've been writin' 209 00:05:44,240 --> 00:05:49,280 letters to NASA, ya' know for years and they don't reply. 210 00:05:49,314 --> 00:05:51,734 So I was wonderin' first of all if there's a, 211 00:05:51,765 --> 00:05:55,005 like if you know a direct line, or anyone I can call? 212 00:05:55,044 --> 00:05:57,914 Ya' know, to maybe get the, the fast track. 213 00:05:57,943 --> 00:05:59,263 - They have a filter. 214 00:05:59,289 --> 00:05:59,769 - They do? 215 00:05:59,807 --> 00:06:01,077 - Yeah. 216 00:06:01,119 --> 00:06:03,599 - Well maybe there's a way to, ya' know, bypass that 217 00:06:03,639 --> 00:06:04,609 is there? 218 00:06:04,640 --> 00:06:06,880 'Cause I mean, I'm still, I'm ready to go. 219 00:06:06,918 --> 00:06:09,708 I mean, I've been training, I built a centrifuge. 220 00:06:09,748 --> 00:06:12,058 I built a centrifuge, almost spun myself to death in it. 221 00:06:12,095 --> 00:06:13,265 [Chris laughs] 222 00:06:13,303 --> 00:06:16,963 I can do like uh, I got up to about 12 g's. 223 00:06:16,997 --> 00:06:19,277 12 sustained g's, I didn't black out so I mean, 224 00:06:19,309 --> 00:06:21,519 that's gotta be worth somethin'. 225 00:06:21,553 --> 00:06:22,873 - Did you tell NASA that? 226 00:06:22,899 --> 00:06:26,349 - I did but they don't, they don't seem to believe me. 227 00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,936 I mean, I could do all the things I- 228 00:06:28,974 --> 00:06:31,634 I mean maybe not, I probably still need some training, 229 00:06:31,667 --> 00:06:35,527 but I'd be willing to go. If, if we could. 230 00:06:35,567 --> 00:06:37,667 So I wanted to talk to you about, 231 00:06:37,707 --> 00:06:40,227 I mean you've gone out in the Space Shuttle two times. 232 00:06:40,261 --> 00:06:41,371 - I have. 233 00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:44,371 - That's- like I can't even believe that. 234 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:47,204 Could you, could you tell me what it's like? 235 00:06:47,234 --> 00:06:49,034 Like, 'cause I'll probably, you know, 236 00:06:49,063 --> 00:06:52,453 realistically I'll probably never get to do that. 237 00:06:52,481 --> 00:06:53,141 - So- And I'm startin' 238 00:06:53,171 --> 00:06:54,171 to accept that. 239 00:06:54,206 --> 00:06:55,276 But could you just- [Chris laughs] 240 00:06:55,311 --> 00:06:56,801 Could you just tell me what it's like? 241 00:06:56,830 --> 00:06:59,520 Like, from the morning when you wake up, and, 242 00:06:59,557 --> 00:07:02,387 ya' know you're going to space? What's that feel like? 243 00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:03,632 - Well it sorta feels like this. 244 00:07:03,664 --> 00:07:05,324 You're sitting in the pilots seat. 245 00:07:05,355 --> 00:07:06,975 I'm sitting in the comanders seat. 246 00:07:07,012 --> 00:07:09,982 Uh, on your side over there, this controls the engines. 247 00:07:10,015 --> 00:07:11,285 - Yeah. 248 00:07:11,327 --> 00:07:14,497 - And this controls the uh, auxiliary power units, 249 00:07:14,537 --> 00:07:15,917 the general hydrolic power for the vehicle, 250 00:07:15,952 --> 00:07:17,232 and everything we need in an emergency 251 00:07:17,264 --> 00:07:18,684 is right here in the middle. 252 00:07:18,714 --> 00:07:20,994 Everything you need in an emergency, including a telephone. 253 00:07:21,026 --> 00:07:24,236 Everything that you need to handle in a big hurry 254 00:07:24,271 --> 00:07:27,211 has to be right here so both of us can take care of it. 255 00:07:27,239 --> 00:07:27,929 - Decent! 256 00:07:27,964 --> 00:07:28,934 - You got it right. 257 00:07:28,965 --> 00:07:30,825 And then over on this side I handle like, 258 00:07:30,864 --> 00:07:32,804 environmental controls, and then the computers are 259 00:07:32,831 --> 00:07:35,801 above my head, and you got all the reaction control system 260 00:07:35,834 --> 00:07:37,774 above your head. You gotta take care of that. 261 00:07:37,802 --> 00:07:39,872 - Okay, so if we just got into here, 262 00:07:39,907 --> 00:07:41,667 and we were just, ya' know, and I mean, 263 00:07:41,702 --> 00:07:44,122 we'd be on our backs right? Pointin' straight up. 264 00:07:44,153 --> 00:07:45,883 This is, sort of a simulator 265 00:07:45,913 --> 00:07:46,953 - Right. Right. type thing. 266 00:07:46,983 --> 00:07:48,683 - But, like, if we just climbed in, 267 00:07:48,709 --> 00:07:50,499 and we were gettin' ready to go to space, 268 00:07:50,539 --> 00:07:51,709 what would be the first thing ya' do? 269 00:07:51,747 --> 00:07:54,397 I guess ya' gotta turn, turn her on, do ya'? 270 00:07:54,439 --> 00:07:56,549 - Uh, yeah, so you plug in your helmet, 271 00:07:56,579 --> 00:07:57,749 so you can talk to everybody. 272 00:07:57,787 --> 00:07:59,437 - Okay. Yeah. We got our helmets plugged in. 273 00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:01,069 Do a COMCHECK. You hear me all right? 274 00:08:01,101 --> 00:08:02,381 - Yes, COMCHECK. All right. 275 00:08:02,412 --> 00:08:04,482 We gotta talk to Houston. 276 00:08:04,518 --> 00:08:05,548 - Come in, Houston. 277 00:08:05,588 --> 00:08:07,488 - Houston, hears you loud and clear. 278 00:08:07,521 --> 00:08:10,591 It'd be uh, commander, pilot, MS1, MS2. 279 00:08:10,628 --> 00:08:11,968 Loud and clear. You all set? 280 00:08:12,008 --> 00:08:13,288 - Yup. 281 00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:15,840 - Okay. And then, uh, we wanna make sure everything's 282 00:08:15,874 --> 00:08:17,464 powered up, we got screens in front of us, 283 00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:18,947 make sure everything's running. 284 00:08:18,981 --> 00:08:22,431 And then uh, you actually have the most critical step, 285 00:08:22,467 --> 00:08:24,367 you gotta, you gotta ignite the uh, 286 00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:25,680 auxiliary power units on your side. 287 00:08:25,712 --> 00:08:27,302 Three switches you gotta throw. 288 00:08:28,369 --> 00:08:29,509 Oh, that was a good sound effect, 289 00:08:29,543 --> 00:08:31,823 that was exactly how it sounds. In fact we, 290 00:08:31,856 --> 00:08:33,856 we make that noise as well. 291 00:08:33,892 --> 00:08:34,312 - Decent! 292 00:08:35,204 --> 00:08:36,344 [Chris laughs] I knew it! 293 00:08:36,377 --> 00:08:38,997 - And uh, then you gotta watch the pressures 294 00:08:39,035 --> 00:08:40,375 make sure everything's coming up, 295 00:08:40,416 --> 00:08:42,066 and that we got hydrolic pressure. 296 00:08:42,107 --> 00:08:43,417 And then, uh, 297 00:08:43,453 --> 00:08:44,523 three and a half minutes before launch 298 00:08:44,558 --> 00:08:45,838 it's gonna check all the systems, 299 00:08:45,870 --> 00:08:48,010 and the whole vehicle sways, you gotta sway with me. 300 00:08:48,044 --> 00:08:49,844 - Is that, what's that, what does that now? 301 00:08:49,874 --> 00:08:52,704 - So you got the big uh, metal pieces on the back of 302 00:08:52,739 --> 00:08:54,429 the Shuttle are moving around, and the engines, 303 00:08:54,464 --> 00:08:55,784 these huge engines, are swinging 304 00:08:55,811 --> 00:08:56,851 - Yeah, I've seen that, all around like this- 305 00:08:56,881 --> 00:08:57,741 - On the tv. They're moving around. 306 00:08:57,778 --> 00:08:59,638 - So the whole vehicle sways, 307 00:08:59,677 --> 00:09:01,257 and moves underneath you as you're sitting there. 308 00:09:01,299 --> 00:09:02,159 - Decent! 309 00:09:02,990 --> 00:09:04,160 - It is decent. 310 00:09:04,198 --> 00:09:07,508 And then, uh, you're checking everything's gonna work. 311 00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:08,957 Houston's got everything sorted out. 312 00:09:08,996 --> 00:09:10,756 You're talking to Launch Control, 313 00:09:10,791 --> 00:09:13,171 and about two minutes before launch 314 00:09:13,207 --> 00:09:14,617 you clear all the, uh, 315 00:09:14,657 --> 00:09:17,207 the extraneous memory out of the computers, 316 00:09:17,246 --> 00:09:18,446 and then the Launch Director 317 00:09:18,488 --> 00:09:21,318 gives you basically a go to launch. 318 00:09:21,353 --> 00:09:22,253 - My god. 319 00:09:23,114 --> 00:09:24,704 Imagine that. 320 00:09:24,736 --> 00:09:26,946 [somber piano music] 321 00:09:26,980 --> 00:09:27,950 - Hi, I'm Julian. 322 00:09:29,016 --> 00:09:30,976 I've been on my own since I was six or seven, 323 00:09:31,018 --> 00:09:32,778 that's when I started drinking rum. 324 00:09:32,813 --> 00:09:34,503 My life has been fucked up, but, 325 00:09:34,539 --> 00:09:35,779 I'm a survivor. 326 00:09:35,816 --> 00:09:37,536 If you want advice I'll give it to ya'. 327 00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:39,917 If you use it, that's fine, but if you don't, 328 00:09:39,958 --> 00:09:41,618 I really don't give a fuck. 329 00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:44,687 [Julian sighs] 330 00:09:44,722 --> 00:09:47,482 - Julian! we gotta go bud, let's go. 331 00:09:47,517 --> 00:09:51,107 - Oh, for fuck sakes. [sighs] 332 00:09:52,488 --> 00:09:54,488 [ice clinks] 333 00:09:54,524 --> 00:09:56,634 Hey this is "Dear Julian," I'm Julian. 334 00:09:57,251 --> 00:09:58,671 And today I'm fucked, 335 00:09:58,701 --> 00:10:01,981 and I shouldn't even be here right now doing this shit, but. 336 00:10:02,015 --> 00:10:04,115 I'm gonna get some rum for it. 337 00:10:04,155 --> 00:10:06,945 And I'm doin' uh, Ricky's with me. Ricky? 338 00:10:06,985 --> 00:10:08,085 [Ricky groans] 339 00:10:08,124 --> 00:10:10,894 Rick wake up, just say hi or, whatever. 340 00:10:10,920 --> 00:10:12,510 - What is it we're doin'? 341 00:10:12,542 --> 00:10:14,612 - It's their "Dear Julian's, we gotta answer some quest- 342 00:10:14,648 --> 00:10:16,818 give people advice, answer their questions, and- 343 00:10:16,857 --> 00:10:18,787 - What the f- "Dear Julian," what is that? 344 00:10:18,825 --> 00:10:19,895 - It's dear, it's like, 345 00:10:19,929 --> 00:10:22,039 ya' know how there's like a "Dear Abby?" 346 00:10:22,069 --> 00:10:23,729 This is "Dear Julian" I'm giving ya' like, 347 00:10:23,761 --> 00:10:26,661 straight up advice on shit, and- 348 00:10:26,695 --> 00:10:27,695 - You give advice? 349 00:10:27,730 --> 00:10:28,800 - Yeah I give advice 350 00:10:28,835 --> 00:10:30,525 because I've been through a lot of shit 351 00:10:30,560 --> 00:10:32,360 in my life, man. 352 00:10:32,390 --> 00:10:33,490 - Are you good at it? 353 00:10:33,529 --> 00:10:35,189 - I don't fucking care. 354 00:10:35,220 --> 00:10:36,770 - Couldn't you give me some advice? 355 00:10:36,808 --> 00:10:38,568 - Yeah, you gotta help me answer these questions. 356 00:10:38,603 --> 00:10:40,543 We've been up all night, we haven't- 357 00:10:40,570 --> 00:10:42,430 What time did we start yesterday? 358 00:10:42,469 --> 00:10:44,019 - [groans] 11. 359 00:10:44,057 --> 00:10:45,057 - 11 a.m.? 360 00:10:45,921 --> 00:10:46,891 And- 361 00:10:46,922 --> 00:10:48,412 - Give me some advice, how many days a week 362 00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:49,650 do you think we can party like that, 363 00:10:49,683 --> 00:10:51,893 and still live till we're 85? 364 00:10:53,135 --> 00:10:55,825 - Oh you can't. You can't party like that everyday man. 365 00:10:55,862 --> 00:10:57,212 [Ricky sighs] You'd be dead. 366 00:10:57,242 --> 00:10:58,312 - Three days a week? 367 00:10:58,347 --> 00:11:00,447 - Nah, you could probab- Nah. 368 00:11:01,833 --> 00:11:03,253 We party like we did last night, 369 00:11:03,283 --> 00:11:04,493 we'd be dead in two years. 370 00:11:04,525 --> 00:11:07,045 - I gotta try to drink through this 371 00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:08,530 [sighs] hangover. 372 00:11:08,564 --> 00:11:10,574 - All right, lets get this started. 373 00:11:10,600 --> 00:11:12,050 - Jeff C. Dear Julian, 374 00:11:12,085 --> 00:11:15,225 Are hockey fights a good way to learn self-defense? 375 00:11:16,745 --> 00:11:18,465 You been in a lot of hockey fights. 376 00:11:18,505 --> 00:11:19,395 - Well I'd say, 377 00:11:19,437 --> 00:11:20,707 if you don't get good at it, 378 00:11:20,749 --> 00:11:23,479 you get the fucking living shit kicked outta ya', so, 379 00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:27,414 yeah you learn pretty fuckin' quick that, 380 00:11:27,445 --> 00:11:28,305 you're not gonna win the fight 381 00:11:28,342 --> 00:11:29,862 you're gonna get fuckin' hurt. 382 00:11:30,620 --> 00:11:31,240 [indistinct] Hockey fights, 383 00:11:31,276 --> 00:11:32,276 I mean, you- 384 00:11:32,312 --> 00:11:33,312 People don't understand this, but, 385 00:11:33,347 --> 00:11:35,937 when you grab the shirt, you gotta try to grab 386 00:11:37,179 --> 00:11:38,909 both parts of the shirt and grab 'em as tight as you can 387 00:11:38,939 --> 00:11:42,249 that way the guy can barely fuckin' throw his little 388 00:11:42,287 --> 00:11:44,357 dinosaur arms at ya', 389 00:11:44,393 --> 00:11:46,503 'cause they're tied up. 390 00:11:46,533 --> 00:11:47,573 Just one piece of advice, 391 00:11:47,603 --> 00:11:48,813 but self def- [low croak] 392 00:11:48,846 --> 00:11:50,156 What the fuck is that? 393 00:11:50,192 --> 00:11:51,402 [low croak] 394 00:11:51,434 --> 00:11:53,024 Oh, is that Dopey? 395 00:11:53,057 --> 00:11:53,917 - Dopey? 396 00:11:53,954 --> 00:11:55,824 - I was wondering where Dopey went. 397 00:11:55,853 --> 00:11:56,723 Dopey the pig. 398 00:11:56,750 --> 00:11:57,580 [low croak] 399 00:11:57,613 --> 00:11:59,173 - That is- You know what? 400 00:11:59,201 --> 00:12:00,341 [low croak x2] 401 00:12:00,374 --> 00:12:03,524 That pig is fucked man, that's why I'm so fucked. 402 00:12:03,550 --> 00:12:04,760 - Well sometimes 403 00:12:04,793 --> 00:12:05,833 at a party he's fun - You put the joint in it? 404 00:12:05,863 --> 00:12:08,073 Yeah, you put the joint in it like that. 405 00:12:08,106 --> 00:12:11,316 [rapid croaking] [load inhales] 406 00:12:11,351 --> 00:12:13,281 [sighs] fuckin' wish I had a joint right now 407 00:12:13,318 --> 00:12:14,728 it'd probably go my head - No no, I would not 408 00:12:14,768 --> 00:12:16,668 I'm not ever fuckin' smokin' from Dopey the pig 409 00:12:16,701 --> 00:12:17,771 ever again man. 410 00:12:17,806 --> 00:12:19,496 - This breakfast is shitty, by the way. 411 00:12:19,531 --> 00:12:20,391 - Well th- 412 00:12:21,568 --> 00:12:25,638 - Cheesies, licker-din-lish, and chocolate things. 413 00:12:25,675 --> 00:12:26,535 - Like no, that's not breakfast man 414 00:12:26,573 --> 00:12:29,473 it's just shit that's left over. 415 00:12:29,507 --> 00:12:30,227 All right. 416 00:12:30,266 --> 00:12:31,466 - What was the question? 417 00:12:31,509 --> 00:12:33,929 - It's a, it's a good way to learn self defense, 418 00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:36,170 actually it's not, it's, self defense is one thing 419 00:12:36,203 --> 00:12:38,383 but it's, it's more like it's a better way 420 00:12:38,412 --> 00:12:40,212 to learn how to kick the fuck outta somebody. 421 00:12:40,242 --> 00:12:40,932 - Yeah. 422 00:12:40,967 --> 00:12:42,037 - Not self defense. 423 00:12:42,071 --> 00:12:43,521 - Normally when you're running around the streets 424 00:12:43,555 --> 00:12:45,275 you're not on fuckin' skates so. 425 00:12:45,316 --> 00:12:46,766 - So you got- I mean, it's easier. 426 00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:48,530 You just get in there and fuckin' grab the person 427 00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:49,600 just start wailin' on them 428 00:12:49,630 --> 00:12:50,600 like he said - If you're a good hockey 429 00:12:50,631 --> 00:12:51,561 fighter you're gonna be a fuckin' 430 00:12:51,598 --> 00:12:53,148 good brawler on the streets. 431 00:12:53,186 --> 00:12:53,906 - Yeah. 432 00:12:53,945 --> 00:12:54,735 - So yes, I guess? I don't know. 433 00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:55,884 - All right that's a yes. 434 00:12:55,913 --> 00:12:57,543 Brian Josh [indistinct] - Stupid question. 435 00:12:57,569 --> 00:12:59,359 It's very stupid. 436 00:12:59,399 --> 00:13:02,539 [groovy guitar music] 437 00:13:11,860 --> 00:13:16,040 ♪ We passed upon the stair 438 00:13:16,071 --> 00:13:20,011 ♪ We spoke of was and when 439 00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:24,010 ♪ And although I wasn't there 440 00:13:24,044 --> 00:13:28,084 ♪ He said I was his friend 441 00:13:28,117 --> 00:13:31,947 ♪ Which came as some surprise 442 00:13:31,983 --> 00:13:35,123 ♪ I spoke into his eyes 443 00:13:35,159 --> 00:13:39,059 ♪ I thought you died alone 444 00:13:39,094 --> 00:13:44,274 ♪ A long long time ago 445 00:13:45,100 --> 00:13:49,550 ♪ No no, not me 446 00:13:49,587 --> 00:13:53,347 ♪ I never lost control 447 00:13:53,384 --> 00:13:55,354 ♪ You're face 448 00:13:55,386 --> 00:13:57,176 ♪ To face 449 00:13:57,215 --> 00:14:00,625 ♪ With the man who sold the world ♪ 450 00:14:00,667 --> 00:14:03,977 [groovy guitar music] 451 00:14:12,921 --> 00:14:16,681 ♪ I laughed and shook his hand 452 00:14:16,717 --> 00:14:20,887 ♪ And made my way back home 453 00:14:20,929 --> 00:14:24,929 ♪ I searched for form and land 454 00:14:24,967 --> 00:14:28,797 ♪ For years and years I roamed 455 00:14:28,833 --> 00:14:32,913 ♪ And I gazed a gazeley stare 456 00:14:32,941 --> 00:14:36,011 ♪ At all the million hills 457 00:14:36,047 --> 00:14:40,017 ♪ I must have died alone 458 00:14:40,051 --> 00:14:45,261 ♪ A long long time ago 459 00:14:46,126 --> 00:14:48,396 ♪ Who knows 460 00:14:48,439 --> 00:14:50,129 ♪ Not me 461 00:14:50,165 --> 00:14:54,125 ♪ We never lost control 462 00:14:54,169 --> 00:14:56,309 ♪ You're face 463 00:14:56,343 --> 00:14:58,173 ♪ To face 464 00:14:58,207 --> 00:15:01,827 ♪ With the man who sold the world ♪ 465 00:15:01,866 --> 00:15:05,146 [groovy guitar music] 466 00:15:16,570 --> 00:15:18,680 ♪ Who knows 467 00:15:18,710 --> 00:15:20,610 ♪ Not me 468 00:15:20,643 --> 00:15:24,653 ♪ I never lost control 469 00:15:24,682 --> 00:15:26,622 ♪ You're face 470 00:15:26,649 --> 00:15:28,439 ♪ To face 471 00:15:28,479 --> 00:15:31,789 ♪ With the man who sold the world ♪ 472 00:15:31,827 --> 00:15:35,137 [groovy guitar music] 473 00:16:04,653 --> 00:16:09,973 ♪ La da da da da da da [music fades] 474 00:16:10,003 --> 00:16:12,113 [pipe music] 475 00:16:12,143 --> 00:16:14,283 The Jim Lahey Show 476 00:16:14,318 --> 00:16:15,458 And Randy. 477 00:16:17,873 --> 00:16:20,743 [ice clinking] 478 00:16:20,772 --> 00:16:21,702 - Did you say action? 479 00:16:21,739 --> 00:16:22,669 - [Offscreen Man] Uh, yes. 480 00:16:22,705 --> 00:16:24,115 - He said fuckin' action, Randy! 481 00:16:24,155 --> 00:16:26,875 - Well you're supposed to say "welcome everybody" Mr. Lahey. 482 00:16:26,916 --> 00:16:28,156 - You say it today, Randy. 483 00:16:28,194 --> 00:16:31,404 - All right, welcome to the Randy and Mr. Lahey show 484 00:16:31,438 --> 00:16:34,678 - You people are a part of an exclusiating, uh, 485 00:16:34,717 --> 00:16:37,477 group of people who are fans of pillertalk. 486 00:16:37,513 --> 00:16:38,413 Right, Randy? 487 00:16:38,445 --> 00:16:39,715 - Mr. Lahey, that's not the right way, 488 00:16:39,757 --> 00:16:41,517 you're supposed to say "Welcome to the Mr. Lahey-" 489 00:16:41,552 --> 00:16:43,242 - Okay we're starting fresh, brand new, okay? 490 00:16:43,278 --> 00:16:44,208 [indistinct] Here we go. 491 00:16:44,244 --> 00:16:46,324 Three, two, one, action 492 00:16:46,350 --> 00:16:48,590 Good afternoon labies and genlemen. 493 00:16:48,628 --> 00:16:51,078 Jim Lahey, Sunnyvale Trailer Park Supervisor 494 00:16:51,113 --> 00:16:52,013 at your service. 495 00:16:52,045 --> 00:16:53,215 And, thank you. 496 00:16:53,253 --> 00:16:54,773 - That was excellent Mr. Lahey. 497 00:16:54,806 --> 00:16:55,666 - [laughs] Thank you, Randy. 498 00:16:55,704 --> 00:16:56,714 - We got a great show, right? 499 00:16:56,739 --> 00:16:58,979 - Right. I'm gonna do a cheers to the audience 500 00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,948 here's a cheers to the audience. 501 00:17:00,985 --> 00:17:02,115 - Give me this drink right here, Mr. Lahey. 502 00:17:02,159 --> 00:17:03,469 - Oh, Randy that's straight up, 503 00:17:03,505 --> 00:17:05,225 have a little sippie poo - I'll just have a little sip. 504 00:17:05,265 --> 00:17:06,775 Say Cheers, audience! 505 00:17:06,818 --> 00:17:08,888 - Yeah, cheers. Okay, so, [claps] 506 00:17:08,924 --> 00:17:12,004 we have so many things to do today, I'll just tell you. 507 00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:15,481 We have, oh! A special! Special new, 508 00:17:15,517 --> 00:17:17,617 what do you call it when you put a new segment in? 509 00:17:17,657 --> 00:17:18,867 [two horn honk] 510 00:17:18,899 --> 00:17:21,319 joke of the day. Joke, I might as well start off 511 00:17:21,350 --> 00:17:22,800 with the joke of the day. 512 00:17:22,834 --> 00:17:23,944 - Joke of the- Randy's bellybutton! 513 00:17:23,973 --> 00:17:24,873 [Lahey laughs] 514 00:17:24,905 --> 00:17:25,595 - That's not the joke of the day, 515 00:17:25,630 --> 00:17:26,740 Mr. Lahey. - It is. 516 00:17:26,769 --> 00:17:28,809 It's an innie. It sh- when he gets horny 517 00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:30,050 - It's not it's an outie everybody, 518 00:17:30,083 --> 00:17:30,983 look. - No it isn't, 519 00:17:31,015 --> 00:17:32,975 it holds two ounces of alcohol. 520 00:17:33,017 --> 00:17:33,637 - Well that's the hair. 521 00:17:33,673 --> 00:17:35,023 - [Lahey] Yeah. 522 00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:36,784 - [Randy] Sometimes the hair catches things, Mr. Lahey. 523 00:17:36,814 --> 00:17:37,854 - [Lahey] Randy. 524 00:17:37,884 --> 00:17:38,994 - [Randy] You gotta pull stuff out. 525 00:17:39,023 --> 00:17:40,093 - That's just- - Even though I don't wear 526 00:17:40,128 --> 00:17:42,408 shirts, like if you go, it's at least, 527 00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:44,370 holds an ounce, right, Mr. Lahey? 528 00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:45,894 [two horn honk] 529 00:17:45,926 --> 00:17:46,956 - Joke of the day. 530 00:17:46,996 --> 00:17:49,276 This is the story of the guy who, 531 00:17:49,309 --> 00:17:52,139 the three guys, uh, one guy. 532 00:17:52,174 --> 00:17:54,214 - "The Three Little Pigs?" [Lahey laughs] 533 00:17:54,245 --> 00:17:56,105 - The one- no. There's three guys, right? 534 00:17:56,144 --> 00:17:57,424 - Three pigs 535 00:17:57,455 --> 00:18:00,075 - Three guys, and they're gonna have a beer together. 536 00:18:00,113 --> 00:18:02,603 And they put the beer down, and uh, 537 00:18:02,633 --> 00:18:04,813 the fuckin' heads in the beer are all heads, 538 00:18:04,842 --> 00:18:07,812 and three flies land on the heads of the beer 539 00:18:07,845 --> 00:18:09,045 all at the same time. 540 00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:12,128 The first guy, he goes, "oh that's disgusting" 541 00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:13,440 and he pushes it away. 542 00:18:13,471 --> 00:18:16,061 And the second guy says "oh that won't matter at all" 543 00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:18,545 and he takes the fly and he throws 'em 544 00:18:18,580 --> 00:18:19,240 - What did he say? 545 00:18:19,270 --> 00:18:20,820 - "That won't matter at all" 546 00:18:20,858 --> 00:18:22,378 - Oh, oh where's he from? 547 00:18:22,411 --> 00:18:25,101 - Ireland, or Scotland, or New Finland, or somewhere. 548 00:18:25,138 --> 00:18:27,278 Okay, and the third guy picks up the fuckin' fly, 549 00:18:27,313 --> 00:18:29,523 holds the little shitbag like this, and he goes 550 00:18:29,556 --> 00:18:32,586 "Okay ya' little bugger, spit it out." 551 00:18:33,250 --> 00:18:34,420 Get it, Randy? 552 00:18:34,458 --> 00:18:36,628 - 'cause he didn't want him to drink any of the beer? 553 00:18:36,667 --> 00:18:37,597 [both laugh] 554 00:18:37,633 --> 00:18:39,083 A little fly! [two horn honk] 555 00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:43,088 - That's the new segment on our show called joke of the da- 556 00:18:43,122 --> 00:18:46,262 Oh, look, Randy. It has a mind of it's own. 557 00:18:46,297 --> 00:18:47,987 [two horn honk] Oh look at this! 558 00:18:48,023 --> 00:18:49,133 Lookit- 559 00:18:49,162 --> 00:18:50,342 Fuck off. [two horn honk] 560 00:18:50,370 --> 00:18:51,510 - You got some cool stuff on your desk, Mr. Lahey, 561 00:18:51,544 --> 00:18:53,174 - I know I- I like this guy. 562 00:18:53,201 --> 00:18:54,171 - Yeah, it's wonderful. 563 00:18:54,202 --> 00:18:55,132 - He's a Mountie. 564 00:18:55,168 --> 00:18:56,578 - I know. 565 00:18:56,618 --> 00:18:58,138 Randy and I play Mountie all the time. 566 00:18:58,171 --> 00:19:00,041 - That's liquor, Mr. Lahey! 567 00:19:00,069 --> 00:19:01,729 - This is a- 568 00:19:01,761 --> 00:19:03,631 somebody- - It's whiskey! 569 00:19:03,659 --> 00:19:05,699 Where does the liquor come out of, his arse? 570 00:19:05,730 --> 00:19:09,420 - Randy don't be silly. Unbuc-screw his head. 571 00:19:09,458 --> 00:19:11,978 No no no no, still got the little label on. 572 00:19:12,012 --> 00:19:14,982 Okay, we have, we have a, 573 00:19:15,015 --> 00:19:18,015 a nautical motif in the show, 574 00:19:18,053 --> 00:19:19,333 and people have noticed it. 575 00:19:19,365 --> 00:19:22,745 As you remember, our last show we asked for a contest, 576 00:19:22,782 --> 00:19:24,062 for the magic box. 577 00:19:24,093 --> 00:19:24,893 [Lahey taps metal box] 578 00:19:24,922 --> 00:19:25,722 The magic box, 579 00:19:25,750 --> 00:19:26,610 this is- - Whoa Mr. Lahey, 580 00:19:26,648 --> 00:19:28,858 that smells like- His head comes off! 581 00:19:28,891 --> 00:19:30,621 - Have a sippie poo, Randers. 582 00:19:32,792 --> 00:19:33,932 [Randy coughs] 583 00:19:33,965 --> 00:19:35,795 That's old as shit, doesn't get [indistinct] 584 00:19:35,829 --> 00:19:38,179 As you can see, this little shit in a bottle, 585 00:19:38,211 --> 00:19:40,461 there's nothing like a shit in a bottle, Randy. 586 00:19:40,489 --> 00:19:43,939 But, [taps metal box] we have people that noticed our motif, 587 00:19:43,975 --> 00:19:45,695 and we have a contest, look- 588 00:19:46,668 --> 00:19:48,118 - What are you talkin' about, Mr. Lahey? 589 00:19:48,152 --> 00:19:49,602 - Randy I didn't tell you, but see this? 590 00:19:49,636 --> 00:19:53,356 This is all the way, all the way from Australia, 591 00:19:53,399 --> 00:19:57,399 it's Crazy Cockatoo Studios, from Australia, 592 00:19:57,437 --> 00:19:59,407 Troy Duncan Productions. 593 00:19:59,439 --> 00:20:01,579 Fuck Off Poetry Inc. 594 00:20:01,614 --> 00:20:04,764 And this- And guess what they sent us, Randy? 595 00:20:04,789 --> 00:20:06,409 Guess what he sent us. 596 00:20:06,446 --> 00:20:09,476 Taa-daa! 597 00:20:09,518 --> 00:20:10,348 See this? 598 00:20:10,381 --> 00:20:12,211 It's a shit in a bottle, Randy. 599 00:20:12,245 --> 00:20:13,445 - [Randy] Lemme- 600 00:20:13,488 --> 00:20:16,458 - It's a shit in a bottle. Look, check this out. 601 00:20:16,491 --> 00:20:18,291 This f- Can you see that? 602 00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:20,430 That's a beautiful little sailing ship. 603 00:20:20,460 --> 00:20:24,050 And see that? That's coral from the Great Barrier Reef 604 00:20:24,084 --> 00:20:25,434 outside of Australia. 605 00:20:25,465 --> 00:20:26,325 - [Randy] How'd they get it in there? 606 00:20:26,363 --> 00:20:27,953 - [Lahey] But guess what, Randy? 607 00:20:27,985 --> 00:20:29,255 Guess what he sent with it? 608 00:20:29,297 --> 00:20:32,157 There not only that boat, but this is a boat, 609 00:20:32,196 --> 00:20:33,716 look check this out. 610 00:20:33,749 --> 00:20:34,959 See that? 611 00:20:34,992 --> 00:20:38,132 That's a ship in a bottle, without the bottle. 612 00:20:38,167 --> 00:20:40,067 - [Randy] Oh! Mr. Lahey, this stinks! 613 00:20:40,100 --> 00:20:41,270 - Look at this. 614 00:20:41,309 --> 00:20:44,039 You put this inside the bottle, you slide it in, 615 00:20:44,070 --> 00:20:45,690 and then you pull on the little string, 616 00:20:45,727 --> 00:20:46,727 you pull like this, 617 00:20:46,762 --> 00:20:49,562 and you pull the mast straight up like that, 618 00:20:49,593 --> 00:20:50,593 and they all stand up like this. 619 00:20:50,628 --> 00:20:51,938 - [Randy] That's how they do it? 620 00:20:51,974 --> 00:20:54,294 - Like that, and that's what's going to shit 621 00:20:54,322 --> 00:20:55,502 in the shit in a bottle. 622 00:20:55,530 --> 00:20:58,360 Randy, isn't that beautiful? 623 00:20:58,395 --> 00:21:01,395 ♪ Sailing sailing over the bounding main ♪ 624 00:21:01,432 --> 00:21:02,332 But guess what? 625 00:21:02,364 --> 00:21:03,374 Randy, guess what I got. 626 00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:05,020 - What have you got, Mr. Lahey? 627 00:21:05,056 --> 00:21:06,636 - I got a special thing also, 628 00:21:06,679 --> 00:21:09,199 now this person- Oh yeah, we have to give- 629 00:21:09,233 --> 00:21:11,103 We're gonna spend a special present back 630 00:21:11,131 --> 00:21:12,441 to the person from here, 631 00:21:12,478 --> 00:21:13,888 who gave us this. - Can I see, Mr. Lahey? 632 00:21:13,927 --> 00:21:15,237 - Yeah, that's the thing. 633 00:21:15,274 --> 00:21:19,074 And, guess what else? I got another one here, from, 634 00:21:19,105 --> 00:21:21,485 uh, this is from Lawrence, Kansas! 635 00:21:21,521 --> 00:21:23,041 And guess what it is? 636 00:21:23,074 --> 00:21:24,904 It's a record! 637 00:21:24,938 --> 00:21:27,288 And they sent this re- And we're gonna make a contest 638 00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:28,490 out of this record. 639 00:21:28,528 --> 00:21:31,218 And they wanted us to send a record contest. 640 00:21:31,255 --> 00:21:33,355 We're gonna play this record, 641 00:21:33,395 --> 00:21:36,255 the way it was fuckin' printed by the [indistinct], 642 00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:38,395 Randy, and we're gonna put it on here. 643 00:21:38,435 --> 00:21:41,055 Bring the camera in and see the record going on. 644 00:21:41,092 --> 00:21:42,892 This is unbelivable. 645 00:21:42,922 --> 00:21:45,202 What we're doin' is we're having a contest. 646 00:21:45,234 --> 00:21:47,004 Swearnet.com 647 00:21:47,029 --> 00:21:48,339 and, 648 00:21:48,376 --> 00:21:50,476 what you can do, is, 649 00:21:50,516 --> 00:21:52,926 if you know what this record is, 650 00:21:52,966 --> 00:21:54,066 you just let us know. 651 00:21:54,105 --> 00:21:57,485 [garbled record noise] 652 00:22:01,941 --> 00:22:04,601 Most of you people who are over 35 or so, 653 00:22:04,633 --> 00:22:06,263 you woulda' heard this. 654 00:22:06,290 --> 00:22:08,220 But they fuckin' printed the record, 655 00:22:08,257 --> 00:22:09,637 with the rel- Like you know, when they- 656 00:22:09,673 --> 00:22:11,303 - It's backwards, Mr. Lahey! 657 00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:13,920 - [Lahey] I know it is, it's just like that Beatles record! 658 00:22:13,953 --> 00:22:16,783 [garbled record continues] 659 00:22:16,818 --> 00:22:20,198 If anybody knows what this record is, 660 00:22:20,235 --> 00:22:22,375 next time we have a Lahey and Randy show, 661 00:22:22,410 --> 00:22:23,450 what we're gonna do, 662 00:22:23,480 --> 00:22:25,380 is we're gonna play the other side, 663 00:22:25,413 --> 00:22:26,623 can't let you see it. 664 00:22:26,655 --> 00:22:28,105 But the other side of the record is when it goes 665 00:22:28,139 --> 00:22:29,379 - Hide it, Mr. Lahey! 666 00:22:29,417 --> 00:22:30,937 - [Lahey] Hide wha- Randy, you can't see it anymore. 667 00:22:30,970 --> 00:22:32,210 - Okay 668 00:22:32,247 --> 00:22:34,107 - [Lahey] But look at this, I'll show it to you. 669 00:22:34,145 --> 00:22:36,215 You remember this? [giggles] 670 00:22:36,251 --> 00:22:37,151 - Lemme see! 671 00:22:37,183 --> 00:22:38,773 - Don't you say a fuckin' word. 672 00:22:38,805 --> 00:22:42,425 All right, so we're moving on, and, 673 00:22:42,464 --> 00:22:43,914 what we're gonna do is, oh. 674 00:22:43,948 --> 00:22:46,368 First I have to have a little drinkie poo. 675 00:22:47,366 --> 00:22:48,876 - [Randy] I'll put this back, Mr. Lahey. 676 00:22:48,919 --> 00:22:50,089 - It's okay, Randy. 677 00:22:50,127 --> 00:22:51,507 You- 678 00:22:51,542 --> 00:22:53,582 You have to have a little- 679 00:22:53,613 --> 00:22:55,793 liquor fruit for the breakfast morning. 680 00:22:57,824 --> 00:22:59,034 [rattling noise] 681 00:22:59,067 --> 00:23:00,277 - [Ricky] Oh yeah, you fucked her really good. 682 00:23:00,309 --> 00:23:01,859 - Oh, she won't come off! 683 00:23:01,897 --> 00:23:02,967 Gimme another one. 684 00:23:03,002 --> 00:23:04,942 - [Ricky] Here, there's an oven mitt. 685 00:23:04,969 --> 00:23:06,039 - Oh yeah, gimme that. 686 00:23:07,386 --> 00:23:09,696 - Don't burn yourself Bubbles. - I'm tryin' not to. 687 00:23:09,733 --> 00:23:11,633 - Hey I got both eyes open but - Hold the stick, Ricky 688 00:23:11,666 --> 00:23:13,906 the brain's still sleepin'! 689 00:23:13,944 --> 00:23:14,634 - Ah, there we go. 690 00:23:14,669 --> 00:23:15,979 - Ah, she fuckin' came apart. 691 00:23:16,015 --> 00:23:17,905 - Oh yeah, but look at that! 692 00:23:17,948 --> 00:23:20,228 - [Julian] Bubs, he's passin' out back there. 693 00:23:20,260 --> 00:23:20,950 - Terry! 694 00:23:22,055 --> 00:23:23,635 Here, bud, come here for one second. 695 00:23:23,678 --> 00:23:25,128 - Fuck, man, you fucked 'er. 696 00:23:25,162 --> 00:23:26,202 - [Bubbles] Before you pass out. 697 00:23:26,232 --> 00:23:28,442 - [Julian] Ricky, watch out man! 698 00:23:28,476 --> 00:23:30,336 - Look at that hot dog. - Holy sh- 699 00:23:30,374 --> 00:23:31,694 That's the most, - Right? 700 00:23:31,720 --> 00:23:35,070 beautiful thing I seen in my whole fuckin' life. 701 00:23:35,103 --> 00:23:35,763 - Eh? 702 00:23:35,793 --> 00:23:37,143 - Can you sauce her for me? 703 00:23:37,174 --> 00:23:38,244 - Yes sir! 704 00:23:38,278 --> 00:23:39,998 - [Terry] Holy fuck! 705 00:23:40,039 --> 00:23:41,969 [Terry whoops] - Easy with the sauce, Bubs. 706 00:23:42,006 --> 00:23:43,206 - Right on! 707 00:23:43,249 --> 00:23:44,939 - Holy fuckin'- - Pump that up! 708 00:23:44,975 --> 00:23:46,315 Whoa! 709 00:23:46,355 --> 00:23:47,175 - Yes sir. 710 00:23:47,218 --> 00:23:48,938 - Jesus. - Holy shit. 711 00:23:48,979 --> 00:23:51,019 How did this- - Get 'er in there! 712 00:23:51,050 --> 00:23:52,190 I'm gonna try! 713 00:23:53,328 --> 00:23:54,948 - [Ricky] Ah man. 714 00:23:54,985 --> 00:23:55,985 - It's hot! 715 00:23:56,020 --> 00:23:56,780 - [Ricky] I bet it is, 716 00:23:56,814 --> 00:23:58,714 yeah be careful man. - Oh fuck! 717 00:23:58,747 --> 00:24:00,467 [Terry exclaims] [Guys laughing] 718 00:24:00,508 --> 00:24:02,298 - She's gonna be real hot- 719 00:24:02,337 --> 00:24:03,197 - WOO! - Let's end it, man. 720 00:24:03,234 --> 00:24:06,344 [ocean sounds] 721 00:24:06,375 --> 00:24:09,685 [boat motor chugging] 722 00:24:19,319 --> 00:24:21,979 [fish cursing] 723 00:24:32,056 --> 00:24:33,056 - Fuck off. 724 00:24:33,106 --> 00:24:37,656 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0